Tuesday, Nov. 07, 2006 - 11:55 P.M.
I am still sad when I think of Richard's death. I wake up and forget for a short time that he is dead. I sob, sometimes stay in bed unless I must get up.
I force myself to do , to go through the motions , when I know that nothing really matters to me now.
I may choose to be bitter like some who have no faith in a reunion soon or grateful for the chance I had to give him 4 extra years of Life. It is not easy but it could be worse.
This entry will be a start of a list of things I am thankful for during this first year of Widowhood:
My support system :
a wonderful doctor who I can call 24/7, school and the chance to learn new things, delightful people who inspire me, pain-in-the butt people who remind me to be patient and count to 10, fun jobs that get me out of the house, a warm bed in my little house, the squirrel that taps on my window, slot machines, seafood buffets, my ipod, the Internet, kind strangers, true crime novels , Pogo, " The Nine", "Desperate Housewives" to be continued
